Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Happy Birthday to....
1. My blood pressure was thru the roof today
2. I had gained 13ish pounds in a week and a half
3. My swelling is out of control
4. My doctor is finally starting to seem worried thanks to 1+2+3
5. Ethan went to measure on time to measure almost 4 weeks ahead... in just under 2 weeks time. Another reason the doctor is worried
6. I've been having unexplained pain that has my doctor freaking out because they're not contractions, but its definitely not normal "pregnancy pains"
Sounds like fun huh? Oh the good side of things we have the fact that the doctor finally thinks Ethan has turned head down. ( about time!). Yeah thats the only good news we recieved today.
So what does this mean? I have no idea. I think I'm more worried because the doctor kept repeating " are you sure your not having chest pain, headaches, blurred vision", " your sure, like positive". As if she was waiting for me to go " well now that you mention it....". No I'm not having these things, and there still isn't protein in my urine which means I still "technically" don't have Pre-E. But I feel like I'm playing with fire and its gonna catch up to me soon.
So what do we do in the mean time? Well the doctor ordered a bunch of labs today. I don't exactly understand what she is looking for, but I think its other signs of pre-e. Plus I have to go for another ultrasound tomorrow to see why the heck Ethan had such a crazy growth spurt. BP check/ appointment again on friday afternoon. Then my regular follow up next week. Yay! 4 trips to the dr's office in less then a week. Awesome right? So a lot is still in the air. I don't know if they'll need to induce me early, or if they will just put me on bed rest. I feel like I don't know anything yet, and I guess I'll just have to wait until all these test come back before I can get some more information.
I am glad she is seems concerned though simply because I have been worried for a while now, and they haven't been, so it makes me feel like my concerns are valid.
The biggest thing I hate though is how other people are treating me. Like I'm made of glass and could break any minute. I got fussed at for so much today for "not taking it easy" when did enjoying my birthday count as hard work? Just because I wasn't sitting at home moping doesn't mean I wasn't taking it easy. I trust my dr and she believes that I can still come and go as long as I'm comfortable, I can work as long as I'm comfortable and I can still be me. I know people are just trying to show they're concern, but its making me start to feel like an invalid, or that its more trouble then its worth having me around( at work, at social gatherings, at all etc). I don't want peoples pity. I want people to trust my judgement and know that I'm working closely with my doctor and when/if she tells me I need to cut back on something, or stay at home like a invalid I will. Until then I want to be treated like me, not some fragile women made of glass who could break if you look at her.
I am trying to make the best out of a hard situation, but it makes it really hard when people baby me. I know my limits and I'm not crazy enough to risk mine or Ethans health by going past those limits.
So on to happier news my birthday was pretty nice except for the obvious doctors office drama. I was able to spend the day with my hubby, did some shopping, went to a movie ( Crazy, Stupid, Love = 2 thumbs up by the way), went to dinner, and then enjoyed cake with my family. A normal birthday, thanks mostly to my wonderful husband who refuses to treat me like I will fall apart, and who pushes me to remain myself throughout all of this. Sometimes I really hate that he doesn't baby me more but today it was the best gift I could have asked for.......